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For Man and Beast,
Language of Love Shares Many Traits
(continued from
page 1)
By Daniel Goleman
New York Times
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Another submissive
display is the shoulder shrug, which, ethologists suggest, derives from
an ancient vertebrate reflex, a posture signifying helplessness.
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A posture
combining the partly shrugged shoulder and a tilted head-which displays
the vulnerability of the neck-is commonly seen when two people who are
sexually drawn to each other are having their first conversation, Dr.
Givens said.
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Being playful and childish is another way potential lovers often communicate
harmlessness. "You see the same thing in the gray wolf," said
Dr. Givens.
When wolves encounter each other, they usually give a show of dominance,
keeping their distance. |
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But in a sexual encounter, they become playful
and frisky, "like puppies," said Dr. Givens, "so they can
accept closeness." The next step is a mutual show of submission,
all of which paves the way for physical intimacy. |
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"We still go through the ritual of courtship much like our mammalian
ancestors," said Dr. Givens. "These same gestures are subcortical,
regulated by the more primitive part of our brain. They have nothing to
do with the intellect, with our great neocortex."
The nonverbal repertoire for flirting is "part of a natural sequence
for courtship worldwide," said Dr. Helen Fisher, an anthropologist
at Rutgers University in Brunswick, N.J., and author of "The Anatomy
of Love" (Fawcett, 1993). "Mothers don't teach this to their
daughters."
...courtship is less about romance... and more about flirting>
 
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